Magickal Ritual Sex

[Fae Oonagh]

Though rather direct and to the point, this page should not be considered pornorgraphic It's not the "ins and outs" of sex. I'm going on the assumption that you already have the basics down, if not please consult with Masters & Johnson or the source of your choice before continuing...I only give private lessons. (wink)

On this page you will find a few sexual techniques that can be done "solo" or with a partner either for Ritual Sex...which is for spell casting purposes or Magickal Sex which is, of course, just for the pleasure of it.

I am the first to say that all consensual acts of love making (solo, one on one, or more ...hey three isn't *always* a crowd!) are acts blessed by and celebrations of the God and Goddess. However, if you are joining a Circle, Group or Coven and they tell you that sex is part of some Initiation Rite.....RUN. You are in the WRONG place. All acts of Ritual Sex should only be performed by Committed Partners (no, they do not have to be "married") who are aware of what they are doing and should never be part of any Initiation Rite. Ritual Sex should almost always be performed to bring something special and very desired into your life or to fruition. On the whole, any type of B&D and/or S&M is NOT permitted here, there is one rather unique exception which we will touch lightly upon later on this page. Those of you seeking to bring that Special Someone into your life may wish to check out the Love Magick page.

On this page you will also find information on herbal enhancements...if you decide to take any of these you do so at your own risk and under your guidance. Never give them to anyone who is unaware of what you're doing...this is illegal! Never give them or anyone or take themself if you are not in overall good health. Read and study before diving into sexual enhancements.

For Maximum Effect, it is very important that ALL steps be followed and not mixed and matched or tossed aside.

If you and your partner are going to be performing any type of Magickal & Ritual Sex you should be aware that you really do need to set aside two solid hours (no phones..turn off the damn cell phone to, no tvs, pagers, kids, or any other type of interruptions should be permitted) to gain the full effect of what it is that you are engaging in. If you're Flying Solo give yourself about an hour.



What you will need:

Ritual Bath---should be taken together for partners.

Candles---lots of them! Surround the tub and the area you will be having sex in with them. Any type, size, color will do. Reds and pinks are best for the purposes of bringing the two of you closer together physically and to recharge your love.

Incense---burn this while you are bathing and in the area you will be having sex in. My personal favorite for this type of thing is Red Amber...nothing beats it in my opinion. Your tastes may vary, you may wish to try lavender or jasmine incense, musk also works well.

Crystals--if this is to be a spell casting event you will want clear quartz crystals around you, put them by the tub and then in the area you will be having sex in. (Yes, I keep refraining from saying "bedroom" not all of us find that to be our favorite place to have sex. Any room you choose is good...if you can perform Magickal & Ritual Sex outside it's even better! Find a nice quiet meadow when the weather is warm.) If this is for the purposes of renewing or recharging an existing relationship then it is good to have garnets, rubies, rose quartz crystals and the like in the areas as well.

CDs---I find that Nature Sounds CDs are truly excellent when played softly in the background during this type of activity. You may wish to use other Mood Music, anything soft and soothing will do.

Lotion or Oil--you will need some type of scented lotion or oil for massage after the ritual bath. This can be any kind of your choosing, anything that calls to you or sets your imagination off wandering. Patchouli is good for this purpose. Rose is good, if you like rose oil. Men will probably prefer a headier fragrance like musk or gold amber. Try not to use essential oils for this purpose, they can be very irritating to sensitive skin.



Enhancements

Long before modern science brought us the wonders of Viagra, Levitra, Cialas and Enzyte, people were searching for ways to make sex better and to last longer. If you are going to be using any type of enhancement first of all, as I already said ...know what you're doing! Just because a substance is "natural" does not mean it's good for you or that it is not harmful! Most enhancements are normally ingested an hour or so beforehand, personally I like to share the enhancement while taking the ritual bath but you may choose to take it before that, it's up to you. Some herbal enhancements available to you are as follows:

Damiana (tumera diffusa) is used in a tea as a sexual stimulant. This is a good enhancement for women especially. It may be purchased in extract form...always check the label and follow the directions. It may taken one to two hours before the act of intercourse, it brings about a mild marijuana-like euphoria which lasts roughly an hour and a half. To make the tea use two heaping tablespoons of dried leaves and immerse in boiled water (one cup) for five minutes. Cool strain and drink, for the most significant effects this tea should be taken daily for two weeks. Do not use for long periods of time as this may be toxic to the liver. Another way to prepare this herb is by making a cordial from it by soaking one ounce of leaves in one pint of vodka for five days. Pour off the liquid, strain and filter. Soak the remaining alcohol drenched leaves in 3/4 pint of distilled or spring water for another five days. Pour off the liquids and strain as before. Warm the water extract to 160 degrees farenheit dissolve 1/2 to 1 cup of honey into it t hen combine the alcoholic liquid and this together. Age for a month. You may wish to strain the sediment from the liqueur before drinking. For the best results in this manner take one or two cordial glasses nightly. The taste is really very wonderful!

Kola Nut--(cola nitida) this is the herb which was used in Coca-Cola once cocaine became illegal and today not even this herb can be found in Coke any longer. This should give you some idea of its action. This is a very powerful stimulant under any conditions, it stimulates the muscular and nervous energies. This will NOT provide a quiet euphoria as Damiana does but will act to "pump you up". Ritual use of this herb mostly comes from the Hindu traditions of Tantra. Tantrics believe sex contains an energy which can change the physical world. Psychosexual energies are the strongest emotion-alterant available that can be disciplined and harnessed and it is the foundation of Tantra. The path to this type of power begins by recognizing and then overcoming restrictive sexual prejudices. (Not an easy process if you have grown up in a main stream religion.) There are many books and exercises which will help you on this path if you choose to follow it. To use this herb as an enhancement use one tablespoon on kola nut powder to a cup of black coffee, you might like to add some honey since the taste really isn't all that great. Another method is to take the capsules daily. Kola Nut is pharmacutically classified as a true aphrodisiac and nerve stimulant. Do not use over long periods of time as excessive use of caffeine may be debilitating to sexual function.

Valerian Root--(Valeriana officianalis) is not classified as an enhancement but many people find that it just what they need to relax and enjoy the experience. If you have a high tolerance to Valerian, it doesn't make you want to go sleep an hour after you take it, then you may wish to take a capsule or two before or during the ritual bath to bring about peacefulness and relaxation. This is will greatly add to the massage experience which follows the bath.

Yohimbe (corynanthe yohimbe)--is a narcotic. Read that again people, it is an herbal narcotic and as such is not to be taken lightly in any circumstances. Ritually it is used for the renewing of love and recharging of it as well. For Pagan Peoples it is added to the ritual cup at the Handfasting ceremony and is only taken by the bride and groom. Yohimbe acts as both a central nervous system stimulant and a mild hallucinogen. The first effects are a lethargic weakness of the limbs and a vague restlessness, similar to the initial effects of LSD. Chills and warm spinal shivers may also be felt accompanied by dizziness and nausea. Then a relaxed and slightly inebriated mental and physical feeling accompanied by slight auditory and visual hallucinations follows. Spinal ganglia are affected which causes an erection in males. The effects of this herb last from two to four hours. This product may be purchased in extract form though you will probably have to look in more "alternative" magazines to find it. Follow package instructions! Yohimbe is an MAO inhibitor. Do not take if you are using sedatives, tranquilizers, antihistamines, narcotics and large quantities of alcohol. No other drugs or herbs should be used in combination with or within a ten hour period of ingesting yohimbe.

There are of course many other enhancements out there available to you, consult with your herbalist or holistic healer before taking.



The Ritual Bath

Is one of the most intimate and important parts of the process of Magickal & Ritual Sex. The bath should be hot and scented with bath salts of your choosing. This bath is not necessarily to purify you or your partner but rather to gently cleanse and relax. In the case of Ritual Sex it is to cleanse you body, mind and spirit before taking part in the ritual. For either purpose, good choices for salts are, lavender, strawberry, lotus, jasmine, amber, patchouli and/or rose. Your tastes will vary, try whatever you like. If enhancements are to be used, take them now. Light candles and incense before getting into the tub, light the incense about five minutes before getting in so that it's scent will fill the room before you come in. Turn on music of your choice, as we said, relaxation tapes, nature sounds tapes, anything soft and soothing. But NOT the radio. Use a tape or a CD of your choice, the DJ's voice can get annoying not to mention the commercials!

Let's get this out of the way now before we go any further...the actual act of intercourse and sexual acts do not take place before the appropriate time! There is no sex in the bath tub!

If you're flying solo, immerse yourself in the water, allow it float over you and completely envelope you. Wash your entire body starting with the head and working your way steadily to your feet, with long slow strokes of the sponge or cloth. Stay in the water as long as you like and just sit back and relax. For those of you with a partner you will wash EACH OTHER beginning with the head and working steadily and slowly down to the toes. You will wash each and every body part but you will not do so in a sexual manner. Light touches in non-erogenous zones, soft words, cuddles and light kisses are always appropriate. The purpose of this exercise is to begin to reconnect with each other (that goes for magickal sex and ritual sex...never perform ritual sex with someone you are unfamiliar with) on an emotional and physical level. To become reacquainted with each others bodies, to find out what touches the other likes and which they do not. Stay in the water as long as you like, do not rush this or any other aspect of this activity. You must relax and take your time in order to fully enjoy it. When you (or both of you) feel it is time to get out of the tub, do so. Dry yourself (with a parter dry each other) off with a large soft towel and proceed to the next area.



The Massage

Once you have come into the room where the sex act will eventually take place (everything should already be set here, candles lit, incense burning if possible. Music playing low. If not, take a moment to do so as you enter the room. If this act is being performed for Ritual purposes you will now Cast and Charm a Circle around the area and Charge it. You may Call Quarters if you wish. You will lay yourself down on the bed if you are alone. The massage process of course works best if you have a partner but do not skip it if you're flying solo. Simply lay back and smooth your choice of lotion or oil onto your body beginning with the neck and working down to the toes. Feel your body, the softness of your own skin, the sensations of your own hand gliding across it. Allow yourself to let go of any restrictions and enjoy the fact of being alone with yourself and bringing yourself pleasure...there is nothing wrong with it. If you are performing this act solo for ritual purposes while you are massaging yourself you will begin to concentrate on the spell you are about to cast, begin to visualize it in your mind.

For those of you with a partner...I'm going to assume male/female here for a moment, for those of you with same sex partners just ignore the order here. Once everything has been done, the candles and incense lit, the Circle Cast, the female will lay the male down onto the bed face down. Make sure the area is warm enough to comfortable to be naked in, if it is not then cover his lower half with a blanket.

A few minutes of Effleurage (slow gentle rhythmic movement of the entire flat of the hand) over the entire back and shoulder area. This will stimulate the skin and the blood flow in the area. In this part you will actually begin to feel your partners energies as they flow inside of him and begin to transfer to your hands. When Effleurage is done begin the massage by starting at the top of the head and gently massage the scalp and neck fully, working backward from the top of the head down to the neck area. Now take the scented lotion of your choice and do another few moments of the Effleurage movement across the entire back, do not work the lotion or oil into the skin at this point. Bring your hands back to his neck and begin a deep massage at the base of the neck working, first outward towards each shoulder and then down each arm, all the way down to the fingers including the massaging of each individual finger, then slowly work your way back up to the shoulders again. Apply more lotion or oil as needed. Once as the shoulder region again you will now begin to knead the skin, take small mounds of it between your fingers and roll it, do not do this hard it is not necessary. Roll small areas at a time and then massage with the palm of the hand applying slight pressure. Work your way down the entire back in this manner, do not apply pressure to the spinal region. I mean all the way down the back to and past the buttocks. Do not forget to massage the buttocks. You will then massage each leg, down to and including each toe in the same manner and the whole of the foot, begin with a few moment of Effleurage and then knead and massage your way down to the feet.

Once the female has completed the massage the male will reciprocate in the same manner. There is no pinching, grabbing, tickling, involved in the massage process. The purpose of the exercise for Magickal Sex, is to further relax the body and mind and deepen the experience. It is also an exercise in trust. You are laying there completely naked and vulnerable and you are trusting the other person to accept you as you are as they explore fully your body and all its wonders and faults. (We all have the faults, don't worry about them.)

As each of you massages the other you should concentrate your energies on the person you are massaging. Concentrate on opening yourself up to them and having them open up fully to you. One or both of you may find that your hands tingle or are getting tired, if this happens remove both hands from the body and snap them quickly into the air. This is most often a result of the persons negative energies leaving the body and being transferred to you, in snapping the hands quickly you are ridding yourself of the energy before it can fully come into you.

Look at your partners body as you massage, really see it and begin to contemplate what the body and the person mean to you. Soft talking and light kisses on the back are appropriate during the massage.



Ritual Sex; Invocations

For the purposes of Ritual Sex after the massage you will state your purpose in a clear voice that does not waiver. Now is the time to invoke the God and/or Goddess of your choosing to come into either yourself or your partner and sanctify the coming act. This does not have to be done in a formal manner! You may simply sit on the bed (or wherever you are), stare into your partners eyes, hold hands, cuddle together, and quietly invoke the deity or deities. If you're the dramatic type, like me, you may stand, state a broad invocation, light a candle, Draw Down The Moon (into the Female) and/or Draw Down the Sun (into the male).

We'll use my Patrons as an example. With your wand or athame, the male will Draw Down the Sun into the female. Raise the wand or athame high into the air and concentrate on the energy of the Goddess. Slowly bring the wand or athame down to gently touch upon the top of your partners head. You may just invision the act of the Goddess going into her or you may invoke her; "Oh, Great Goddess Aphrodite, Goddess of Love and Beauty, hear me. Descend now into ____ (magickal name preferred here) your loyal attendant and follower. Bless our Rite with your power." The same will be done for the male; "Oh, Great God Ares (here one does not invoke my Lord in his God of War face unless you really know what you're doing) God of All Things Wild and Free, hear me. Descend now into ___ (magickal name preferred here), your loyal attendant and follower. Bless our Rite with your power."

As you finish the invocation touch the wand or athame to your partners third eye or top of the head.



Magickal Sex; Next Step

For the purpose of Magickal Sex you will skip that step and solo or with a partner will slowly begin the sexual act. Begin with soft kisses, on the neck area is best for the ladies! Tell each other what you like about the other person, don't be shy or afraid. This is your partner if you can't talk to him/her there's no one you can talk to. Now is the time with words and deed to reaffirm your connection to each other. You may wish to perform a frontal massage upon each other at this time, that's always pretty good. There is no kneading in frontal massage, use Effleurage only.

Either way; Magickal or Ritual,the most important thing is to simply take your time and enjoy either yourself or each other. The act of love making should not be rushed...ever. While the moment of climax or orgasm is intense and important...how you get there is more important and will set the tone of the intensity of the act.



The Fun Stuff

As you and your partner explore each others bodies in a sexual manner (or as you explore your own in this manner) try to keep your touches soft and light, this is magickal/ritual sex...not S&M or B&D ...nothing even approaching those two methods should ever enter into a magickal/ritual sexual experience as they are about power and control and not about emotion or connecting, they are not spiritual. The only and rather bold exception to this is if you are participating in a very high-powered Binding or Unbinding Ritual. Even then, any and all bondage should be extremely light and easy for the bonded person to get out of. I do not recommend this unless you are absolutely sure of your partner and his/her intent.

The build-up to the actual act of intercourse should be slow and intense...enjoy the journey because once you've reached the destination, baby, the ride is over.

As for all the various sexual acts, most are perfectly acceptable here as long as (of course) they are done willingly by both partners with no harmful intent. In fact, this will probably turn out to be the time when you are most ready to try something new, to experiment and explore. The giving and receiving of oral sex is wonderful but (especially in the case of the male) should not be given to the point of climax before the intercourse climax comes..afterward do it all you want..just wash off a little first. (Oh Gross! I can't believe she said that!) Anal intercourse is also perfectly acceptable if both partners are willing or if you like to do that for yourself while flying solo. Again, it should not be done to the point of climax/orgasm until the climax/orgasm of vaginal/penal sex has been completed. (Same sex partners will have to alter that to their own personal tastes).

At the climax/orgasm in the case of Ritual Sex, this is the moment you've waited for. Hold it back for as long as you can and concentrate on taking in the energy from your partner and the energy you are creating around you, harness it, focus it, imbue it with your own will, visualize what it is you are trying to accomplish. Hold it! And release it all in one great rush with the climax/orgasm keeping a firm picture in your mind of what you want to accomplish through this act. Be absolutely positive beforehand that you are completely sure of what it is your are willing. Sexual energy is the most potent of all and you will get what you asked for from using it in this manner. In other words, be careful what you wish for... you just might get it.

Afterplay is just as important as foreplay. To fully complete the act you have just accomplished it is necessary to acknowledge that your partner is still there! Warm kisses, close cuddles, touching of all kinds (unless you get your hand pushed away) are very very appropriate now and can lead to another round! Also, for Magickal and Ritual Sex do NOT FORGET TO GROUND afterward. Sharing of traditional Cakes n Ale or other substance (I like ice cream!) is just about essential after.



One of Auntie Moon's Favorite.....

There is one school of thought on the actual act of intercourse and I would like to discuss just this one here...it happens to be my favorite. When both partners are ready to engage in the act of intercourse the male lays his body on top of the female, keeping the bulk of his weight leveled on his hands and arms, the female then uses him as a tool. Literally. He does not move...repeat..he does not move. This takes a lot of discipline on the part of the male, but give it a shot guys. He allows her to move under him, to take him inside her as fully as she wishes at any given point. An experienced female in this area needs a male with a strong back!!! An experienced female, before the act is completely will (most likely) literally be completely wrapped around him and more or less hanging from him. When done right this experience is completely mind blowing and definitely worth the effort and discipline on the part of the male. There's some guy out there somewhere right now saying "Hey! If that's what she wants, why don't she get up on top?" OK, Mr. Smart Guy...here's the answer...the walls of the vagina do not swell and grab the penis as well in the female on top position as it does with her underneath him, mainly because when she is on top she is unable to use the strength in her legs to move the lower portion of her body and must rely on her middle torso to upper body to move herself. The restriction on the lower body causes a lessening in blood flow, lessening the gripping action of the vaginal walls and thereby lessening her sexual experience and yours too.